Dear Chris,
This may seem like a bit redundant of a first post, but I'm not particularly used to this, so it's going to be a bit of a shot in the dark, but...
How is it being dead? How is it dealing with the deaths of those around you?
I seemed to be rather blase about it myself, at least when it first happened. I've never been a big goodbye person in the first place. Maybe that's because I have gotten so used to saying bye to my mom or dad for reasonably long periods of time, the "See you later" always seemed more appropriate. I took that approach to high school, and it seemed to work out OK. Of course, I am bound to those people geographically, and we all periodically return to the same place for the sake of out parents in a way that alumi will never return to Yale, save for perhaps The Game.
I could account my acceptance of the departure of my loved ones to an old habit of Stoicism, where I just accept things as out of my control and make the best of them. And in that case I find the best example of this to be from Gladiator:
(the quote is about 1:20 in)
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1139332/gladiator_movie_dreath_smiles_at_us_all/
I think the second reason perhaps that I can be so cavalier about this whole death business is that our relationships are built upon more than just physical presence, as important as that is. It's the fact that we can have these kinds of conversations despite just plain silly distances between us that matters.
It seems that I at this point I should say that I am sorry that you are dead. That seems like the obligatory thing to do. But I don't think I am. I think it is unfortunate that you will be going so far away with so little opportunity to see you, but I am not sorry that you are gone or that you are going so far away. I know this is a huge opportunity for you. And even if you find it ridiculous that I am being so selfless, there is a plus for me. One of my closest advisers and confidants is going to an entirely new land with an entirely new culture, from which he will form entirely new world perceptions which he will then share with me.
So, go off and explore. And the posts shall continue.
Love,
Alan
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This post is exactly how I have been feeling- I hate the idea of saying goodbye to people, especially those I hope to see later. But I still get worried about the possibility of losing touch.
ReplyDeleteAlso, am I the first comment ever? Are y'all even looking for an audience? (there's an undercover deep question for you)